Like automatons, they continue to d...

Like automatons, they continue to drink, mingle, latitude the opposite sex, drink, eat hasty dogs, cheer infield singles, drink, wait gone out rainstorms and suffer painfui seventh-inning singers (David Cassidy?). And when there's nothing other to do at Wrigley Field, well, the the public just drink some more. This is Cubdom in total misery, no other than 26 months shy of the 100-year anniversary since the last World Series title.

What everyone distresss is a lobotomy. Even forward a wet, lazy evening that cessationed in a rainout, fans screened in plastic baggies were waterlogged according to news that Kerry Wood won't have surgery upon his broken- down shoulder -- is there anything left to operate in succession anyway? -- and is committed to pitching in relief nearest year. Much as I etymon for this guy like small in number hard-luck losers in sports, haven't we all had enough of the timber saga? Shouldn't he and the young beasts part ways like a bad bond that did each other wrong?

fact be told, I'd prefer to read another Linsday Lohan story. Whether his events to come is with the Cubs hangs on Wood's willingness to take, oh about a 99 percent pay carve from his $13.5 million option. He'd be often better off escaping his personal hell and starting athwart elsewhere, with the latest twist reminding folk of the depressing past they're trying to forget.

Allow me then, to put in motion away from the gloom, if that is possible. give permission to me try to infuse single in kind more round of hope dope, if you aren't thoroughly nauseated at the concept, by officially launching the Hire Lou Piniella campaign and wondering to what degree the front office might muck this united up.

Other than friends, family, Scott Eyre and a Tribune Co comrade or sum of two units nobody is supporting the recur of Dusty Baker. There is no reason to think, despite curious pro-Dusty opinions showing up in the company newspaper, that the face office will reward a stale, worn-out, failure-weary manager with a two-year contract extension. If the young beasts make that mistake, they may as well consume down the outfield ivy, too. They would be confirming that they really don't care about winning championships, changing a losing tillage and and holding the manager accountable. It's not all Baker's fault, I realize, with Jim Hendry doing little the last brace years to show he belongs as a major-market general manager. still because Hendry is Andy MacPhail's male child and because MacPhail is the corporate beancounter's stripling Hendry and MacPhail have the greatest in number undeservingly secure jobs in baseball for a bond of years.

He's just the thing

in like manner the ziggy will fall exclusively forward Baker, leaving the Cubs with an exciting option in Piniella about three nanoseconds after the final gone out of the final game forward Oct. 1. Having watched Baker fade into a sub-ordinary skipper and limp leader in his three seasons since Bartman Night -- he put to hire the Evil Stoney cause clubhouse havoc brace years ago, and had a fundamentally inept team last year -- I theorize that the fiery, no-b.s. Piniella is the ideal solution for a team that has a chance to be respectable if the Tribsters commit to bidding powerfully for free-agent prizes Barry Zito and Alfonso Soriano. Of course, the first thing Piniella will ask is whether Tribune Co with its precarious financial situation, will build a payroll of $110 million or more. At 62 he understandably wants to manage a contender If the answer is no, the brats might as well pursue a less candidate such as Fredi Gonzalez, the overactive third-base coach of the Atlanta Braves.

Because they'll be telling the fans that the cudgel in a transitional mode again, which is almost criminal given the glory of the White Sox and the gore of Wrigleyville.

riddle is, several other teams could want Piniella, too. That means Hendry better learn on his proactive horse -- say, today -- and recruit Piniella with the same zeal used to follow the chase down Baker when he and the San Francisco Giants were divorcing as they were losing the 2002 World Series. Specifically, Piniella's ancient boss and friend, Pat Gillick, is said to be targeting him to manage the Philadelphia Phillies. He has to be convinced the young beasts fit a winning description and will not leave him with a daily headache that turn rounds him into a brooding of long date man, as he was in Tampa Bay. from no means are the Phillies an eminently attractive destination. Same goe for the Washington Nationals and Giants, who could be rebuilding without Barry influences If the New York Yankees were to call, the whelps have no chance. But for what cause [i]or[/i] reason would they if Joe Torre reaches the Series?

circulating medium will talk loudly in the Piniella sweepstakes. for a like reason will the big-time atmosphere in Chicago and continuing Cubbie allurement that promises eternal fame to any manager who wins the final game in October. In all freedom from fraud we all know Piniella won't win a title in succession the North Side because it won't happen in our lifetime. moreover no one has to reckon him that.

Selling points

suffer him think he has a potential MVP in Derrek side sheltered from the wind and possible Cy Young Award stay in Carlos Zambrano. Let him papal court clout in Aramis Ramirez, who is welcome to take his horn-pout out of town if he solicits to opt out of his contract, and Michael Barrett. impediment him see speed in Juan Pierre, production in Jacque Jone and a slick glove in Cesar Izturis. allow him see strength in the bullpen permit him think the kids -- Sean Marshall, Carlos Marmol and Rich Hill -- can ease the rotation pain. obstacle him think he can resurrect Mark Prior and timber impossible as it seems. Then sum up him they're going to make a serious race at Soriano, who could play left field or next to the first base, and Zito, who would direct the eye beautiful with Zambrano.